Thoughts for today

Have you ever wanted something you couldn't have? Tasted true delight to have it taken away? Loved the idea of something only to find the reality disappointing? Has the truth ever hurt? Has beauty ever slipped away before you could focus on it? 

Of course we have. We are human, we let beauty slip. But holding onto yesterday creates sorrow. And who has time for that? Let the regret go and embrace tomorrow. Yesterday is gone and today may be your last tomorrow.

My dear friend inspired me to live with no regrets. She lived for what she wanted, when she wanted it. She was selfish and impatient, yet loved by everyone. When she passed away in 2004, I held her sweet hand one last time and promised her I would remember her every day. I refuse to live with regrets. I don't live a wild life, I try to be careful for the sake of my husband, children and lifestyle. But no regrets. I love what I have and wouldn't trade it for anything. But who hasn't let something good slip away? A friendship left to wither? Precious moments with people we love? A night out with friends? 

Its not possible to have it all. We pick and choose the right things at the right times and just try not to mess anything up. Hoping we make the right choices, praying for heavenly advice, we go into the world. Don't forget to leave your footprints in the lives of others, and give yourself all the credit you deserve.

Hopefully All In Time

One day, I'm going to have it all. I'm just that kind of person. 

My greatest wish is a huge chunk of land out here in backwoods Mississippi so I can have a big garden and a couple farm animals. I love to watch nature grow. I love to grow things with my own hands, plant, and nurture. I want to feel the dirt between my fingers and eat the fruits of my labor.

One Day

I want to see my children running with no boundaries, no worry for their safety. I love the safety of my home town. I want to raise animals we can eat, and teach my children to care for them as well. I want the stability of owning something all my own.

I do not see all this happening any time soon. But I know myself, and I know my determination. One way or another I will get it done. Watch and see World, I will get my way!!!

My children and my children's children will enjoy their own little pieces of heaven. Happily ever after won't have to be this hard for them. God willing, I will provide for my loves!

Girls Day!

Today was a total girls day!!! First, my WONDERFUL neighbor Amanda watched little SugarFoot (Anna) so my mom, middle sister and I could go to see Breaking Dawn. My most awesomely wonderful father kept the bigger littles at my house!

So, Mom, S and I headed to the movie theater. Mom's treat! Get to the ticket counter and dearest mother didn't have her debit card. FORGETFUL WOMAN!! Oh wait, I used it last, UGH, my bad. So I paid and she promised to pay me back.

BREAKING DAWN: PART 1. Great movie. Not quite enough of the book in it, but still a wonderful movie. Now I'm just upset the next one will take so long to come to theaters. :(

Then we did some walmart shopping, hit the sporting goods store and came home for Grace's 5th birthday party. Its not actually her birthday, but who wants to party on a Monday?! We had my own version of Chicken Parm, opened lots of presents, then had great cake. Gotta love that Walmart bakery!

All in all this was probably one of the most fun days in a long time. SugarFoot even went to bed at a decent hour. Mom found some old migraine medicine, which makes me ecstatically happy cause its non-narcotic! Now I'm going to finish uploading this dang video to facebook and then hit the wonderful sheets!

New Photo

Went to the hubby's 10 year class reunion a couple weeks ago. Big thanks to my bff, Sissy, for letting me borrow the dress. Not really sure how I ended up looking pregnant in this picture, but I assure you, there is NO baby aboard at this time <3

Husband-napping!

Holidays and family events are coming soon!! This said, I am going to admit, I WANT TO BE SELFISH!! 

I am in desperate need of some ME time. Well, let me rephrase, COUPLE time. I wanna kidnap my hubby and run away! 

I love my family, I love his family, but we need time alone. 

With our financial situation there is no escape in sight. There are bills, doctor visits, work, gifts, etc. that all come before frivolous things. 

My children and their happiness mean more to me that a night on the town, yet I feel held hostage by the four walls of my home.

I am a slave to my own guilt. My parents NEVER had a date when I was a child. I have four sisters, and I never remember my beloved parents leaving us with a sitter to go have fun. I don't even remember my mom getting out of the house alone to grocery shop!

I have high expectations of myself as a mother and I feel I am sabotaging my relationship with my husband to reach these high goals. 

Maybe next payday we will run away. Maybe not...

Gosh I feel like I'm rambling, but these are my thoughts!

Don't worry...

Don't worry about being hungry, I am mom. Don't pick up your toys, I am mom. Don't ask me for anything, I am mom(and moms are psychic). Don't bother trying to help, I am mom. I will cook, clean, wash clothes, pick up after you, clean up after your friends, and keep snacks on hand. I don't mind driving 15 miles to the grocery store every day for what you need. I don't mind using all my time to follow you around making sure you're ok. I will always be right behind you. I am mother, daughter, chef, taxi driver, laundress, etc. And it's all for you.

So smile sweet children, put your worries at bay. I am your mother, I won't go away. 

The 4yr old guilt game...

So my big girl asks me yesterday, "mommy when I grow up and be an actor, will you come to all my plays?" OOH, playing the guilt game already, huh? This is the downside to having an exceptional child. She knows everything. What she doesn't know she asks, or in some cases, makes up her own story... But making me feel like I've let her down, knowing I have been there for everything in her life. This kid isn't just exceptional, she's slick! Her true talent IS theatrics, but who knows what she'll do with it. She could be an actor, or a lawyer, day time TV host, the possibilities are endless.... :)

I'm so very excited it is FINALLY November!!! Cool breeze, yard full of leaves and cute clothes aside, this is the biggest birthday month at my house! My big girl will be 5 and my sweet husband will be 29! My birthday has come and gone and littlest girl has to wait 7 months for her first. As much as we love birthdays, we also LOVE Thanksgiving!! All the families cook and we make trips to each home. I cook on Friday so everyone can come to my place too! TRUTH: I love to cook. I love my family. I love a house full of loud, happy people.